I sit here just staring at the screen. There are simply no words for this. No words. I don't think I am ready for this. I can't seem to make it reality. I feel the need to cry more but the tears are stuck somewhere between my heart and throat. My little Merin and her dear Mike were killed in a car accident on August 20 2010 on their way home from a wedding. We had spent a beautiful evening at a family wedding. My memory of the night is beautiful and still. I watched Merin as she glided across the lawn to our table at the wedding. How graceful she is. Graceful in everything she does. I tell her to meet me after the wedding and we will take a few quick pictures on our way home, "just for fun. you and Mike look so cute!" She grins and the plan is set. Every little detail of that night seems to be magnified. The way she looked at Mike. How he held their baby as he tried to get 7 week old Ysa to sleep. How he raced from the table to meet her as she crossed the lawn and somehow had the table cloth stuck to his pants. We met along the side of the road. Their little family huddled together. So perfect. So beautiful. Merin, I am so grateful you were so happy. It brings me a lot of comfort. Mike, thank you for loving my sister. For bringing her the happiness that you did. Merin there really just are no words. I miss you so much I shake. And yet I have complete and utter faith that I will see you again. I am so deeply grateful for eternal family. How much our Father in Heaven loves us. Merin I know I am so blessed to have had you as my sister. To have had you for 22 years. Yet, how I wish you were still here. Thank you for your little baby. We love her so much. Its truly humbling to have her in our home. We all look forward to watching her grow. To see little bits of you and Mike shine through. She is a beautiful, strong spirit.
Merin took this last picture of Daylan and I. I wish you could have seen her with my camera. So cute. So unsure. So beautiful.