Memories are funny. Sometimes I'm sure I blur or sweeten them, while some I know are true. As I went through my film a memory flashes to the front of my mind and I can almost taste the air in the small room under the dance studio I attended when I was younger. Always a tad too cool for comfort but I had loved the moody solitude it provided. Ugly old couches, dimly light with the sounds of a distant piano playing a floor above. It was the perfect enviroment to daydream. The books that cluttered the ground were full of beautiful and elegent ballerinas and the grain in the images hold  clear in my memory...and I still feel inspired.
Sitting backstage at the Jubilee memories again surround me. I was able to watch and photograph one of Merin's closest friends as she preformed. As more memories came, I wondered if perhaps memories are more from the heart than the mind...the music crept through the dressing room speakers and my heart sunk. A fresh wave of grief. I am learning that they will continue to come and go. Time helps in a way but on the other hand not really the way I had expected it to. I just have to let it settle and the moment moves on. Alex is sweet and gentle and there is something about her that quiets my ache. She had wrapped her arms around me and I didn't feel so sisterless. Sisterless. This thought weighed me down heavily for a few days. Until I felt comfortable with the knowledge that I am not sisterless, I feel my sister's love often and have a beautiful reminder of that as I raise Ysa.
These last few images of Alex are as she is about to go on stage moments before the curtain opens after intermission. Watching her dance- she is absolutely stunning.

Alex has just been promoted to second soloist at The National Ballet and we are all so very excited for her!!!

And a fun side note, the head piece is Karen Kain's. She keeps it in a blue Tiffany's box and lent it to Alex for the performance.  It felt beautifully romantic to me:)



Anonymous said...


I THOUGHT I recognized Alex! She, along with Merin, was looked up to by my daughter Meagan. Beautiful pictures which brought back beautiful "heart-felt" memories.

Thank you.

Jannemccue said...

Stunning photos and beautiful sentiments. Thanks for sharing.

Cheri said...

Fantastically beautiful photos. You captured the elegance and emotion of the ballet. The moments backstage, in the wings and dressing rooms. I could weep for the beauty - and for the memories these evoke. Thank you.

Ysa is perfection in her tutu. I loved her absorption in the dancers that day.

And Alex! She is wonderful.

Love, LOVE these. Some of my very favourites.

xo - Mom

Alex Mac said...

Oh Eden! The pictures, and more importantly, your words, mean so much to me. Thank you for spending time with me backstage! And I can't wait to see you and the kiddies this summer :)

Anonymous said...


Elizabeth Cranmer said...

Elegant. in every way.

natvan said...

Memories, what a perfect word to describe what these photos bring to me. Thank you Eden, I love them (and you!)

H and E said...

Wow these images give me the chills they are so beautiful, honestly I could look at them over and over again.
Ysa in her tutu is perfection!

p.s. I am back to blogging and going to try and be more consistent!

Day said...

I don't know what to say, I seriously love each frame and the feeling of the atmosphere on stage. Great work.

Veronica said...

I am your cousin Suzy's sister-in-law, and I just had to tell you how stunning I think these are. I love everything you do.

kathryn said...

Beautiful is not enough to describe these photos. I love each one but especially the one with Mrs. Suman in the wing. Her pride is just exploding our of her. I Looove it! What an amazing accomplishment for Alex. Great job Eden. I think of you and your beautiful family often.

Megan said...

One of the first times I ever met Merin she was teaching my sweet niece to "do baller-et". Merin would help her point her toes and stand just-so. It was precious. Thanks so much for sharing these little moments!